Ever just want a day to yourself? Away from the rest of the world? No phone calls, no texts accept from those whom you love? Little to no tech? That’s been me today. And the day has been unsuccessful. I got 2 phone calls from work over stuff, and have been having a texting conversation with my boss. I’ve had telemarketers calling me and wanting to buy things that I can’t afford. I had a phone call which brought me back down and made me realize that I haven’t made any progress towards one of my goals because I’m afraid of it. Of being rejected and told ‘no’. But if I don’t work on it, don’t fight for it, the for sure long term answer will be no and I’ll be screwed.
I just wanted today to be quiet. So that I can reset and hopefully be better. Have less negative thoughts going through my head. But it hasn’t happened. I went and got feed for Gucci this morning. I also gave one of my friends my tub of Aquaphor for his up coming tattoo session, good luck with that! Makes me want to go and get another tattoo already. Well, fill my current outline in at least. A new tattoo might have to wait a few years.
After we unloaded the truck of feed and bedding I let Gucci out for a little while, just so he could get some bucks and kicks out while I made up his stall. He ran all the way to the top of the field and trotted around looking for some grass. When he couldn’t find any he came cantering back down the hill, throwing his front feet around and was squealing as he cantered along where its flat. I just stood and watched enthralled by the beauty of my horse, of all horses in fact. But just seeing him be himself with nothing on was amazing to me, even if it was for only a few strides.
I did do something for me though today, besides spending time with Gucci. I decided to dye my hair again. Even though I really wanted to dye it purple I did it the Raspberry red once more. My mom helped me, and it doesn’t seem like as much of my skin on my face is neon red minus one ear and a little bit on my forehead. Its not as red as it shows on the box because I don’t bleach my hair, but it did come out a really nice shade of red, one that I can see, so that made me really happy.
While I was sitting and letting the hair dye set it, I watched some Castle (hello Nathan Fillion)
and read one of the books on my Kindle. Just a quick fluffy read after my serial killer story which I was really into. But after something dark and heavy like that sometimes I need something fluffy to bring me back so I don’t get too horribly down just from reading.
I haven’t really done much else with my day. I helped my parents move some furniture around. And I ate some of mom’s home made sugar cookies. Nom nom nom. I can’t eat them all that I brought home, otherwise my boyfriend won’t get any… unless I just don’t post this part. Nah, I’ll be good and share. He’s been working his butt off this week at work, being super busy every day. He deserves a cookie at least.
I guess that’s it for today. Sorry it wasn’t super amazing or interesting, but sometimes we just need to make it through the day. To enjoy the little things in life. Like seeing a horse free and in motion. Having the freedom to dye your hair. Just to be able to curl up in the sofa and read a book. Stealing a cookie from the cookie tub. You never know.
Just keep swimming!